Saturday, October 31, 2009

Am I Getting Fired?

This blog is the closest thing I have to a secret diary. In that spirit, I need to confess that I am scared shitless that I will be fired from my job.

Recently, I got a voicemail from my sister asking me to contact a creditor of mine who has been harrasing her. She told them how to contact me, but they refused, insisting that harrasing her has been the only way they have been able to get me to contact them. I called them immediately from the break room at work. I was loud. I was angry. I swore. I even threatened bodily harm when the supervisor I spoke with got me upset. Getting nowhere with him, I hung up and finished my shift.

Later that night, I went home, called them back and managed to straighten things out with a manager that was both kind and very helpful. She made sure that I would be the only person contacted about my debt.

I thought that was the end of it. Instead, apparently there is a rumor at work about my being hard pressed for money. I have creditors hounding me for payment. I'm on the brink of financial ruin. All untrue, but that's the rumor. This rumor went from coworker to coworker's family to my father, then back to me. I had to do a lot of sharing to do to smooth things over with my parents.

Now I'm gripped by the fear that someone complained to Human Resources about my wrath and swearing, which will lead to my getting fired. Why? Because apparently, employees should never, ever, ever have to tolerate a "hostile" work environment. You simply can't show real, human emotion while at work without getting in trouble. If you let the facade crack, and someone complains, your job is at risk.

Irrational fear? Time will tell.